It's been a long time, since my last update about my own life... it's been a long time since I wrote my real feelings here... I know, we should not write about our true life, but yeah... different people writes different things....
I've been neglecting this blog so much... I'd rather copy and paste the story from other sources just to make sure this blog is updated, but with boring matters...Somehow, I realized, people loves to read what ever it's about the personal life... and that's what I am going to write about... but I will not go too far, I have my own limitation to write my personal life...
So, my life has been going the tough times.... My relationship seemed uncertain in some parts, but we managed to continue the "journey"... I've fell down and cried in so many times, but I was asked to stand and be brave for the challenge.... People has been so much loves to see me fall... The victim was not only to me, but my fiance too...
Since last Friday, I started using the Digi postpaid which was actually good for me... I don't need to top-up my phone whenever I'm out of credit... But there was something very bad happened before, and needed me to change my phone plan and it's under my fiance's name....
How would you feel when your happy day turns out to be the worst day of your life? for me, I feel so sad, and I will surely cry out heavily.... and that was happened to me... I went out with my fiance, and we were enjoying ourselves on that day... When the night came, my fiance got the idea to check my phone list... Through online... yeah, don't be surprised.... even though you're using prepaid, you still can check the list of the people you sms-ed and called through online....
So what was he found? He found few numbers, on my sms-ed lists... and found out that I've sms-ed my ex, since the last May.... and yeah, I knew it... He was very mad... he talked to me in a high voice, and shaking tones... He asked and asked... I said it NO.... yeah, true... It was not me... but I knew it, and I understood... He has the hard evidence, and how much I denied, it means nothing... I know, it was not me... I remember, on that certain date he mentioned, my phone was with him.... But yeah, I think no ones will trust me compared to those having the proof....
Just after he found out the list thing, he started to contact my ex... and I felt uneasy with the situations... Plus, my ex mentioned it to him too... He said to my fiance I did messaging him.... oh God!!! Trust me, that was time I felt like falling from the edge of the highest mountain in the world... Why was my ex doing that to me.... I swear to God, I never want and never ever sms-ed or called my ex... and I hate him so much no matter what happens...
Still, my swore means nothing compared to the evidence... I felt lost... I was scolded by my dad and even my brothers about this... They even thought the same... They said, I am a liar... and how dare was me to go that far to lie a person whom cared for me so much... and how shameful was when they thought my ex was still catching me, but actually me were catching him... it's not me!!! How I wish I could scream to their ears saying it was not me...
When the swear-word VS evidence, evidence wins.... my swear-word means nothing... even until now, I knew it... some people are not trusting me... and that, I go on with my life... and make sure the way is right enough for me, just to make sure no ones is taking advantage of my life.... I feel sad over what has happened.... but I am glad I still here to write, and still together with my fiance.... Even though I know, among our happy times,there are worries and feeling not trusting me in him... But never mind... I am doing what I should to build back the trust from him... and I know, it's not my fault... because it was not me whom sms-ed and called my enemy.... and I should not feel guilty.... No matter what people going to say about me... All I can say, I didn't do that.... And to him, I am sorry for all this.... Swear to God, I never did that.....






